Oct. 24, 2024

MomTok, Authenticity & Sara Wiles

MomTok, Authenticity & Sara Wiles
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Season 4

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We’re pushing the boundaries today and we’ve got help! The queen of not holding back - SARA WILES - is joining us. We don’t need a warm-up for this one, even though the three of us have never spoken outside of Instagram she jumps right into the mayhem. In fact she kicks us off by asking if we want her introduction in the form of  “ trauma version or the business version “ … spoiler alert, we got both. 

The three of us tackle dog diarrhea, male skincare routines, online triggers, “queef gate” and “soaking” in search of the existential question - how much failure “makes” an entrepreneur. Safe to say we don’t know a single entrepreneur who’s gotten away without failure - so inevitably the conversation always turns to - how did you fail, what did it look like, and what parts are funny now? And ultimately, why is it so freeing to share this stuff? Does everyone else just feel a huge weight lifted when you get to laugh at some of the nonsense you’ve experienced or even accidentally created? Even if it is just eating tacos upside down with a few friends?

Who is she? Sara is the founder and CEO of The Start and Grow Co - leading the industry in Virtual Assistant training. But at one time - she had the dream to be a yoga teacher - she talks about the first time she invested in additional training - and the challenges of bringing up dream after dream to your friends and family - when you’ve failed in front of them. The risk. The reward. And ultimately the growth. Something we can all relate to.

Sara brings a “life first, business lens” to her work style, her trainees, and today’s podcast. She says it in her introduction, but the way she weaves through today’s recording, is such a testament to that philosophy. You really get to experience who she has personally and then also who she has professionally. And after all, aren’t we just kidding ourselves when we say that we’re two different people ( at home and at work?). The three of us share a very special and vulnerable common denominator (one we’re becoming obsessed with). The freedom in being allowed to show up as who you are authentically and creating a space around you for others to be understood and to do the same. But we are left with one question. Which one is more embarrassing? The mermaid queef or the fact that it could’ve been interpreted as a fart? 

Sara Wiles - 
CEO and founder of The Start and Grow Co.

On Instagram 
@thestartandgrowco
@sara_wiles 

For more mayhem, be sure to follow us:

Insta @marketingandmayhem
YouTube @MarketingMayhemPod

And don't forget to leave us a 5 star review! Or message us to deep dive into your topic or just give us feedback!

Hosted by @raebecca.miller and @jennyfromthe843

00:10 - Virtual Assistant Business Chat With Sarah

11:52 - Unhinged Laughter and Embarrassing Moments

19:28 - Awkward Yoga Training and Dating App

32:24 - Navigating Dating Apps and Failure

38:00 - Persistence in Pursuing Passion

43:04 - Embracing Authenticity and Triggers

47:26 - Embracing Authenticity and Self-Acceptance

55:59 - Sephora Love and Skincare Trends

01:02:14 - Beauty Product Recommendations and Personal Grooming

WEBVTT

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Hey, hi, hi Hi.

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Oh, there's a guest.

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You know how I love a guest.

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Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited you're here, because I literally been like dying to talk to you.

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We have Sarah Wiles.

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You're going to get to tell us about what you do, because I'm going to mess it up, and I don't want to mess it up, but I have been like waiting for this podcast.

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I'm so, so, so excited to finally get the chance to speak with you.

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Okay, tell us you in a nutshell.

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Okay.

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And then we're getting straight to mayhem.

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Okay, great, are we doing like the trauma version or the business version?

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Oh yeah, no, oh my God, I love that.

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Where shall we begin?

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No, I'm just kidding.

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I brought both of my personalities, gangs, all here.

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All of her is here, so my name is Sarah Wiles.

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I am the founder and CEO of a company called the Start and Grow Co.

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And we lead the industry in virtual assistant, training, education and coaching with a life-first business lens and a human-centered approach.

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Oh my gosh, I love that, thank you, I made it myself.

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I know I feel like, hey, I made it, hey, yeah.

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Okay.

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So you and I have a mutual friend, but our paths have not crossed.

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Isn't that funny.

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Wait, but you guys are in South Carolina, yep, okay, so that's how you know Whit.

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Whit was my Well, so do.

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You probably haven't heard this, but I shared the story of how I met Whitney on the podcast early on.

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Okay, I commonly refer to her as Taco Bell.

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So with my friends and family, taco Bell, taco, it's Whitney.

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So I was on a walk and I was a pregnant person and she pulled over and said I have a baby and you're pregnant, do you want to go to Taco Bell and Target with me?

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And I said I don't have my wallet.

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And she said I got you and I got in a stranger's car.

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If you are safe in anyone's car, it's Whitney's car, but that is amazing.

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We literally like went to the drive-thru and then we like went to Target together and we like unpacked all of our like very new mom, pregnant mom baggage and like we, that's how that.

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And like, literally just last weekend, her and I went to Dierks Bentley and Lee Bryce she texts me in the morning at eight o'clock.

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She goes I don't know what happened, but my front seats are covered in tacos and I went and looked at my outfit.

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I was like there's none on my outfit.

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She goes I think we ate our tacos upside down in the front seat of my car and I was, like I think we did.

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I can so remember those early motherhood days and just like I can see that desperate Like I can, like, I'm sure, to either people who aren't moms or maybe somebody who is in better shape postpartum I was not sounds like none of us were I can totally see that desperation where, like a woman with a baby pulls over and is like, will you be my friend and would you like to get in this car and I'll feed you?

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And you're like, yeah, for sure.

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I'll cover you up.

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I can totally see that that sounds crazy, but also yeah, how you're like no, no, 100%.

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I'm doing that 100%.

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I got in her car.

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People have been always written these little notes, like, so that was a bit of a risk.

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I'm like, yeah, well, it wasn't our last risk for sure.

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She had a baby in the car.

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Well, like there was a baby.

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And, by the way, this was like when Target had popcorn machines and so we actually fed the baby popcorn and it didn't go amazing.

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And she was like we should definitely not tell Troy.

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We like made the baby choke a little bit.

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You know, we're all in this journey together.

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So, god, truly yeah, that's exactly how it started in our neighborhood.

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We were both like fairly new neighbors and definitely new moms and we started walking every day.

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Oh, I love that.

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So Whitney was my big sister in my sorority and like she was just everything that you would expect that she would be.

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She was like a barrel of fun, but also like get your shit together and don't fuck this up.

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Do you know what I mean?

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Like, um, oh, I just love Whitney so much.

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She was like Sarah was always like the prettiest, so we made her be the face, so like when you walked in the sorority you had to be the first one at the staircase.

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That's what she told me before we started recording and I was like what a badge of honor.

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I know it's the prettiest so you have to be first on the staircase.

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Like how do you live with?

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that it is a little true, and today I come looking like a naked mole rat, so I hope you can see, you are beautiful.

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You can handle all the eyelashes you've got.

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They're under control, don't you worry.

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Oh Lord, oh my gosh, okay, so what is the mayhem for you?

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Today?

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You have a sick kid at home Y'all I have.

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First of all, I was sick all last week with God knows what.

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I have a sick kid at home.

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I have an elderly dog over here who's 14, and he will not stop shitting everywhere, and you can't even be mad at him because he's just old.

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So I just like get the bissel out, clean the shit up.

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We live parallel lives like this, so I actually live for like you shared this situation last week where you were actually like teaching online live and the dog dug a shit in your office and you couldn't get up because you were in the middle and you couldn't get up because you were in the middle, like it was diarrhea, y'all.

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Like it was permeating my nose.

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But you know, when you can like, there's certain conversations you can stop and some that you can't Like.

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I was actively coaching someone so I was like, well, this is a problem for later.

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This is a problem for later, it's life.

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I like this is my life with an elderly dog.

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Like it's just, I'm like wow.

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Life.

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I like this is my life with an elderly dog, like it's just, I'm like wow, so I wish that didn't just happen, but okay, I can't even be mad.

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Um, we shouldn't have have y'all found Folex yet.

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It's the carpet, the spray carpet stain remover.

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No you can go get it for $6.99 on Amazon.

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Okay, this is magical.

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I cannot tell you how many every rug my dogs have shit on.

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Every single rug.

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Oh my gosh, I just got a new rug.

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Two days later, a dog pooped on it.

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Every time, Every freaking time.

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Go get you.

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I'm telling you it's called Folex.

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I will send you all a link.

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It is $6.99 on Amazon.

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It is magical.

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It gets stains out of everything.

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This is how we are about Amazon.

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Like I use my Amazon links just to share things I'm obsessed with, it is never making me a million dollars.

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We I don't understand how these people are paying their mortgage off Amazon, because you get like $30 for every thousand that you sell.

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But I'm like I'm going to share the $6 Folex so that it went I can make 2 cents.

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Yeah, exactly Right, a hundred percent.

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It's like $29 on the thousand.

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I'm like okay great.

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Hey, so I can buy more Folex, because my dog keeps shitting Everywhere.

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Oh my gosh yes.

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And what else has gone.

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Oh, and my husband's also out of town, so I'm solo parenting, but I don't know if y'all feel like this.

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Sometimes it's easier when they're out of town.

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Yes, I do.

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I do this girl, jenny, right here yeah, well, the pressure's off for, like, actually making the meals.

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Yes, yeah, like the whole, like protein, starch, vegetable, and now I'm like a single mom.

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So now the pressure is like I'm standing in front of the fridge eating cheese.

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When Nate's gone, I'm like, yeah, and I feel like I don't have to like pick up like the house, like I'm like this, like I feel like every day before he gets home from work and this is nothing that he does, but I feel like everything has to be like in its place and like tidy so he doesn't feel chaotic after working, you know, all day.

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So when he's gone, I'm like I could just be disgusting and I love it.

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I love it.

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Uh-huh, I love it.

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Yeah, I feel that I just like it just definitely changes the energy and like what you can get away with, we're like now I'm just like let's actually just hang out in my bed and watch movies like I said and I order in for every meal we fall asleep.

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We fell, fell asleep watching Taylor Swift last night, like everything has been great, everything is great.

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So I just noticed, because I posted the reel this morning, that you were like now I'm going to have to watch it.

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I need both of you to watch this.

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Mormon mom talk.

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Sarah, you have to, okay.

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I started, I tried, it didn't like, pull me in.

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Okay, so my first episode.

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I felt the same way.

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I was like these ladies are on drugs, yes, and so young.

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So young and fresh and I also am like I'm not like the biggest reality TV show, but I saw your soda when we started shooting and I'm whatever is happening there, there, the way, the web that they have woven of.

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Like you know, they can't drink coffee, right, yes, no, okay, they can't drink coffee.

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I didn't know, they get around it is they are jacked to high heaven on soda all day.

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Like they will show up at a gas station at 8 am, pumps of syrup in there, like they, they are, like they are.

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They have like parties where like a person will come and instead of it being like a bartender, it's like a soda bartender and he'll bring all of this stuff and like they just walk around with these giant styrofoam whatever's and then they um, I saw this girl the other day who was like first day watching mom talk and it was her hair in a messy bun and then it was like the third day and she was doing her curls that way.

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So I did them all weekend and I went to a birthday party on Saturday and one of the moms was like your hair looks so pretty.

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I was like, oh my God.

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You were like oh my God, thanks, it's mom talk hair.

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I got it from the Mormons.

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Well, they can't.

00:10:02.123 --> 00:10:03.283
So what else?

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I think I've told you this.

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Becca, one of my college roommates was a Mormon and she was a freak.

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Oh, like she had different boys in her room like every night.

00:10:15.374 --> 00:10:17.254
Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

00:10:17.254 --> 00:10:20.057
And I'm like how deep do we go on this podcast?

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What are we allowed to talk about here?

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So we are marked explicit.

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You can swear Great, yes.

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What are we allowed to talk about here?

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So we are marked explicit.

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You can swear Great yes.

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No, we don't talk about family.

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I'm trying not to have a lot of drama in my post-divorce life.

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Yes, yes, congratulations.

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By the way, I really appreciate that.

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I've had two people say it like that, yeah, and people don't know what to do.

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But that actually is the response.

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Yeah, that actually is the response yeah, truly, it's a big decision, it's a big battle, it's a lot.

00:10:48.975 --> 00:10:57.104
And like I like I thought how are you?

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Like?

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Like I'm actually great.

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Yeah, like, if you were going to ask me that, you should have asked me that when I was in the middle of the thick of it.

00:11:00.360 --> 00:11:04.409
Like now it's a congratulations, like I really appreciate that.

00:11:04.409 --> 00:11:05.740
So, thank you, I just wanted to.

00:11:05.740 --> 00:11:06.081
You're welcome.

00:11:06.403 --> 00:11:07.085
Yeah, for sure.

00:11:07.085 --> 00:11:35.746
I've had a couple of friends go through divorce and like I've watched that process and I think, like just to go off on a small tangent, like I think society, I think we're getting so much better, but like I mean also my parents were each divorced three times, so like I got it, I got it down, you know, I just think like society makes it like it's this like horrible thing and in in, in truth, like sometimes people just fall out of love and they're not for each other anymore, Just like friends, you know, fall out as well, and like isn't it beautiful that you can just not have to do that anymore.

00:11:35.746 --> 00:11:36.690
So congratulations.

00:11:36.750 --> 00:11:41.203
Um back to mom talk so I haven't watched it.

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But when it came out I was with 12 other girlfriends in Atlanta for an award show and they had all watched it, so they were all telling me about it.

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Have you heard about the sex situation?

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that they do.

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They're calling it soft swinging Okay.

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So it's not that.

00:12:02.919 --> 00:12:03.462
What are you talking about?

00:12:03.462 --> 00:12:04.206
The Fruity Pebbles?

00:12:05.179 --> 00:12:05.600
Is it Fruity Pebbles?

00:12:05.600 --> 00:12:06.082
Is it Fruity Pebbles?

00:12:06.082 --> 00:12:12.431
I'm talking about the fact that, apparently, what they do because they can't have sex before marriage, right, but Soaking.

00:12:12.431 --> 00:12:16.341
Yes, what'd you call it Soaking, soaking?

00:12:16.341 --> 00:12:17.104
Have you heard of this, jenny?

00:12:17.645 --> 00:12:18.027
No.

00:12:18.307 --> 00:12:18.950
You're going to die.

00:12:19.639 --> 00:12:25.932
You are going to die Because this is like a very desperate like way around.

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I don't know.

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And they're for such a big religion, right, like so grounded in like church and state like the way that they are all actively aware and working around these things is blowing my mind, soaking is the term Soaking.

00:12:46.975 --> 00:12:47.855
Do I need to like?

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Do?

00:12:48.056 --> 00:12:48.316
this.

00:12:48.801 --> 00:12:52.030
No, I'm going to tell you, I'm going to tell you, sarah's going to tell you, I'm going to tell you.

00:12:52.030 --> 00:12:59.272
So it is insertion Okay, but once inserted you can't no movement.

00:12:59.272 --> 00:13:15.388
But what you can do is get somebody to jump on the bed to make the movement happen without the two individuals inserted doing the movement yeah, it requires a lot of other people.

00:13:16.269 --> 00:13:18.245
What Y'all are joking right now.

00:13:18.245 --> 00:13:20.664
No, no, no, oh my God, I'm totally Googling it.

00:13:20.664 --> 00:13:21.668
No, no.

00:13:21.668 --> 00:13:24.159
Look it up we were making all sorts of jokes.

00:13:24.159 --> 00:13:24.864
I just like GPT googling it.

00:13:24.884 --> 00:13:25.971
So no, look it up, we were making a joke.

00:13:25.971 --> 00:13:26.575
Yeah, I had to chat gpt.

00:13:26.575 --> 00:13:29.828
Something from hinge the other day that I was like shook about.

00:13:29.828 --> 00:13:33.642
That came onto my hinge and I was like I didn't know what it meant.

00:13:33.642 --> 00:13:40.581
So this happened to me where it was like um looking for a kitchen table relationship, do you?

00:13:40.600 --> 00:13:41.241
know what this is.

00:13:41.241 --> 00:13:43.166
Does that mean you would have sex on the kitchen table?

00:13:43.326 --> 00:13:45.190
No, that would be like.

00:13:45.190 --> 00:13:47.553
So I was like this seems odd.

00:13:47.553 --> 00:14:05.174
I think I should chat GPT this just to see, because like it feels like it might be a something it is again in non-monogamous relationships like where traditionally, where you had sister wives, they were like each a separate relationship with the husband.

00:14:05.174 --> 00:14:13.527
Okay, kitchen table means that everybody's friends enough to sit around the kitchen table together, and like that's a big part of the dynamic.

00:14:13.527 --> 00:14:14.610
And I was like nope.

00:14:16.120 --> 00:14:17.307
I'm so confused.

00:14:17.307 --> 00:14:20.147
This is a thing, oh yeah.

00:14:20.147 --> 00:14:25.006
No, there's a lot of things, so this is what was probably going on in my college dorm.

00:14:25.950 --> 00:14:28.645
Yeah, no, I think you would have had to be involved.

00:14:28.645 --> 00:14:30.980
Are you the jumper, jenny?

00:14:31.022 --> 00:14:31.826
were you the jumper?

00:14:31.826 --> 00:14:34.748
Let me go ahead and set the record straight.

00:14:34.788 --> 00:14:39.731
Okay, so on this show, a bunch of them have had children by the time they're 16.

00:14:39.731 --> 00:14:42.845
Some are divorced by the time they're 21 or 22.

00:14:42.845 --> 00:15:05.210
They've been in these like they marry, like all the things that you kind of, that we that I'm going to speak for myself that I kind of traditionally worry about, like making rules where people have to rush into decisions that they shouldn't, or like all these constraints they're under them, and so you get to see this like crazy microscope of like this is kind of what it looks like.

00:15:05.210 --> 00:15:12.208
When you make all these things off limits, people find a way around them.

00:15:12.208 --> 00:15:30.947
And then there's like there's this one who's like literally Whitney, who's doing this dancing video while her kids in the hospital with RSV oh my gosh, yeah, and she takes like a lot of heat for it, obviously, but because she was like feeling left out while the other girls were still doing their mom talk together.

00:15:30.947 --> 00:15:38.529
She literally is like low oxygen, low whatever, and I'm like that there is no limit.

00:15:39.130 --> 00:15:45.630
None, there's no limits because you know I don't tick and you know I don't talk.

00:15:47.384 --> 00:15:49.750
So we got to get you on the tick and the talk, God.

00:15:50.721 --> 00:15:51.683
I'm done with the things.

00:15:51.683 --> 00:15:53.206
No, but wait, can I?

00:15:53.226 --> 00:15:54.188
just can I try?

00:15:54.188 --> 00:15:57.592
Yeah, Can I give you my, my one minute pitch?

00:15:57.592 --> 00:16:01.886
Yeah, please, please, your case I only use.

00:16:01.886 --> 00:16:05.894
So the best thing about TikTok is you can train that algorithm fast, okay.

00:16:05.894 --> 00:16:09.044
So I have my algorithm trained perfectly.

00:16:09.044 --> 00:16:15.663
At night I might partake in some gardening, and then are we all on the same page.

00:16:15.663 --> 00:16:17.167
Yes, okay, great.

00:16:17.167 --> 00:16:20.052
And then I have my 10 minutes of giggles.

00:16:20.052 --> 00:16:23.846
Okay, like I'm already good and giggly, I have my the algorithm trained.

00:16:23.846 --> 00:16:26.552
It shows me the most unhinged shit, okay.

00:16:26.552 --> 00:16:30.039
And then I have my friends trained to only send me unhinged shit.

00:16:30.039 --> 00:16:36.826
So I sit on there for 10 minutes every night and it is the best 10 minutes of my day, jenny, because I laugh, I've gardened and I laugh.

00:16:36.826 --> 00:16:46.054
So I'm just making my case to you that if you feel like you need more giggles in your life, you don't have to use it for conspiracy theories or crazy shit or people yelling at you.

00:16:46.380 --> 00:16:48.416
You can train that algorithm back.

00:16:48.416 --> 00:16:49.807
Just laugh and I'll show you the funny.

00:16:49.807 --> 00:16:50.374
Only giggles.

00:16:50.374 --> 00:16:50.960
I'm only there for you.

00:16:51.181 --> 00:16:54.110
But the funniest of them is so funny, even on Instagram.

00:16:54.399 --> 00:16:56.087
That's what I feel about Instagram.

00:16:56.148 --> 00:16:58.559
I just want to pee my pants, it's funnier, it's funnier.

00:16:58.899 --> 00:17:00.682
TikTok is so because it's more unhinged.

00:17:01.804 --> 00:17:02.725
Yeah, okay.

00:17:02.725 --> 00:17:04.909
It's more mayhem, but like.

00:17:04.909 --> 00:17:14.130
I just really live to like borderline pee my pants, laughing Like I and Jenny actually like she's a big AFV, like we grew up.

00:17:14.130 --> 00:17:15.973
Old school, oh God I love it.

00:17:16.099 --> 00:17:18.067
She loves to see a person fall.

00:17:18.067 --> 00:17:20.441
Fall is my jam Girl.

00:17:20.622 --> 00:17:21.780
you could go on TikTok, jenny.

00:17:21.780 --> 00:17:26.492
You could go on TikTok and you can type in funny falling videos and you will get compilations.

00:17:26.492 --> 00:17:28.271
You could just sit there and laugh for hours.

00:17:28.271 --> 00:17:29.259
10 minutes.

00:17:29.601 --> 00:17:33.210
I was going to say Jenny loves to watch a person, just like eat shit.

00:17:33.210 --> 00:17:34.092
That's like her.

00:17:35.260 --> 00:17:39.271
She gets me every time it's AFV, it's so good.

00:17:39.921 --> 00:17:41.748
So this is like our adult AFV.

00:17:41.748 --> 00:17:44.769
I'm like whoever thought of this of us recording ourselves.

00:17:44.769 --> 00:17:45.992
This is like our adult AFV.

00:17:45.992 --> 00:17:48.119
I'm like whoever thought of this of us recording ourselves.

00:17:48.119 --> 00:17:52.782
First of all, it makes it so much easier when you are actually the person who fell because you're like, ooh, I hope I actually have the time when I was a kid.

00:17:52.782 --> 00:17:54.087
I'd be like God, I hope no one saw that.

00:17:54.087 --> 00:17:57.550
Now I'm like I look around and if no one's laughing I'm like you have to be kidding.

00:17:57.550 --> 00:18:00.028
Did no one just see me?

00:18:00.028 --> 00:18:08.424
Did no one see my cardigan get stuck on the door handle?

00:18:08.424 --> 00:18:13.858
Did nobody see my handbag open and something really disgusting fall out like come on, oh yes, no, I'm with you, I live for it.

00:18:13.858 --> 00:18:15.122
I like love the laugh.

00:18:15.122 --> 00:18:16.606
Do you think it's because we work so hard?

00:18:17.750 --> 00:18:25.641
yeah, totally, and also just like if we're not laughing we're kind of crying, and so totally, you can only do that so much of the time.

00:18:25.821 --> 00:18:37.963
You have to find the joy, or else we're not going to make it okay, so this is actually a really good segue, and I didn't mean for it to be but like let's talk about embarrassing moments for two seconds yes can we?

00:18:38.884 --> 00:18:46.776
yes, queef gate oh my god, I died, but I I'm farting, but I mean, it's there, you have a fart one.

00:18:47.519 --> 00:18:49.787
No, she is like she won't go to yoga with me.

00:18:49.906 --> 00:18:54.165
I refuse to do yoga, oh you don't fart.

00:18:54.646 --> 00:18:59.583
Yeah, she's like terrified of farting and I'm like wait a minute Talking to the queen of queef gate.

00:18:59.723 --> 00:19:04.712
Yeah, let it rip girl, do you want me to tell the story?

00:19:11.180 --> 00:19:11.622
Yes, can we please?

00:19:11.622 --> 00:19:12.365
Yes, and it actually was a yoga story.

00:19:12.365 --> 00:19:12.767
So Jenny was scared.

00:19:12.767 --> 00:19:16.381
Before we started having conversations with you she already had the yoga fart fear, yes.

00:19:16.381 --> 00:19:23.551
And then I think Kwiske validated it at a very spiritual level and now she's like traumatized.

00:19:23.980 --> 00:19:25.405
She'll never go to a yoga class again.

00:19:25.405 --> 00:19:35.661
Okay, so in 2013, I did a yoga teacher training and it was a very intensive process for six months.

00:19:35.661 --> 00:19:44.807
Six months I gathered with 30 people every weekend and we would spend literally eight hours Saturday, eight hours Sunday at the studio with each other.

00:19:44.807 --> 00:19:46.531
So you really got to know these people.

00:19:46.531 --> 00:19:51.932
It wasn't like you go to a class you fart you queef and then you just hope you never run into these people ever again.

00:19:53.480 --> 00:20:04.766
So we're like halfway through the training, so like three months in, and we would sometimes practice and then our teacher would come around and she would pause people and she would say, okay, hey, and here's how you could assist someone here around.

00:20:04.766 --> 00:20:10.096
And she would pause people and she would say, okay, hey, and here's how you could assist someone, here's how you could get deeper into this pose.

00:20:10.096 --> 00:20:26.380
And I was in a pose called mermaid and if you don't know what that looks like, imagine being in a forward split where one leg is in front of you and one leg is behind you and then that back leg is lifted and bent and then you would take your you know, one of your arms and try to place your toes into the crook of your elbow.

00:20:26.380 --> 00:20:29.750
So you look like you know, the little mermaid on a fucking rock.

00:20:29.750 --> 00:20:33.426
Okay, so I'm in that pose this is before children, by the way.

00:20:33.539 --> 00:20:39.247
So like things were a little, you know, I wasn't as comfortable with my body and the downstairs and the movements.

00:20:39.247 --> 00:20:39.867
You know what I'm saying.

00:20:39.867 --> 00:20:42.050
Like now I can do far less Right.

00:20:42.050 --> 00:20:51.261
So I'm in the pose and my teacher comes over to me and she's like, great, she stopped.

00:20:51.261 --> 00:20:52.990
The entire class of 30 people, all eyes on me, everybody watch.

00:20:52.990 --> 00:20:56.060
I'm going to help Sarah get into this pose deeper and I'm like, oh, okay, cool, I'm getting some like personal attention.

00:20:56.060 --> 00:20:56.561
This is fun.

00:20:56.561 --> 00:21:00.607
And then I feel it right, like you feel.

00:21:00.607 --> 00:21:03.031
Y'all know right, you feel when the air goes in.

00:21:03.571 --> 00:21:10.619
And then you're like it's coming out right and I am just like doing Kegels Like I've never done Kegels in my life.

00:21:11.301 --> 00:21:13.028
Trying to hold it in.

00:21:13.028 --> 00:21:14.325
Can we seal her?

00:21:14.325 --> 00:21:16.047
Like, how do we seal her right?

00:21:16.047 --> 00:21:34.662
And I'm just sitting there In this pose, my hands are in the air, one hand is back, my teacher is holding my body parts, everybody is looking at us and it goes right out and I'm stuck in a pose so I can't even like walk someone, I can't even be like oh my God, and walk away.

00:21:34.662 --> 00:21:47.614
Right, my entire I'm sure my entire body turned apple red and the only words that I could muster out of my mouth were oops, because what else does one say?

00:21:47.614 --> 00:21:49.221
Oops.

00:21:49.221 --> 00:21:52.627
So then I had to go home, tell my husband.

00:21:52.627 --> 00:21:55.113
I was like I'm going to have to die now.

00:21:55.113 --> 00:21:56.303
This is going to be the end.

00:21:56.303 --> 00:21:57.829
This has just happened.

00:21:57.829 --> 00:22:00.339
But the worst part is no one said anything.

00:22:00.339 --> 00:22:01.929
Nobody even fucking acknowledged it.

00:22:01.929 --> 00:22:03.712
Okay, nobody even acknowledged it.

00:22:03.712 --> 00:22:04.585
Nobody was like anything.

00:22:04.585 --> 00:22:05.508
Nobody even fucking acknowledged it.

00:22:05.508 --> 00:22:06.852
Okay, nobody even acknowledged it.

00:22:06.872 --> 00:22:08.214
Nobody was like oh damn girl, that's happened to me too.

00:22:08.214 --> 00:22:09.238
Or this is like the falling.

00:22:09.238 --> 00:22:09.819
It's like the falling.

00:22:09.819 --> 00:22:13.790
You're like are we pretending Like I didn't it didn't happen.

00:22:13.790 --> 00:22:15.585
You saw this right, yeah.

00:22:16.307 --> 00:22:21.463
So and then I had to go back the next weekend and like sit in a corner and just like hope nobody would.

00:22:21.463 --> 00:22:23.627
And my biggest fear, jenny, was your fear.

00:22:23.627 --> 00:22:28.817
My biggest fear was that people thought it was a fart and not a queef, because I don't know why that's-.

00:22:28.837 --> 00:22:33.306
But your biggest fear was that people thought it was a fart and not a queef?

00:22:34.127 --> 00:22:34.568
I don't know.

00:22:34.568 --> 00:22:36.973
It doesn't make any sense, it's nonsensical.

00:22:37.319 --> 00:22:37.740
I love that.

00:22:37.740 --> 00:22:38.921
That was your biggest fear.

00:22:38.921 --> 00:22:39.682
You're like God.

00:22:39.682 --> 00:22:40.863
I hope to God.

00:22:40.863 --> 00:22:43.444
Everyone knows that that was a bleep, not a fart.

00:22:43.444 --> 00:22:48.729
I'll tell you what being a chick is a real.

00:22:48.729 --> 00:22:49.229
I mean.

00:22:49.229 --> 00:22:56.694
I have never I'll never right live something that is so illogical but also the most fun ever.

00:22:56.694 --> 00:22:57.695
I'm always like.

00:22:57.695 --> 00:23:00.018
This is not grounded in logic.

00:23:00.018 --> 00:23:01.741
I'm having a great time.

00:23:01.741 --> 00:23:03.611
I actually just hope that no one thinks that was a fart.

00:23:03.611 --> 00:23:04.842
I'm like what?

00:23:04.842 --> 00:23:05.022
That?

00:23:05.022 --> 00:23:05.202
Like?

00:23:05.222 --> 00:23:07.954
I actually just hope that no one thinks that was a fart.

00:23:07.954 --> 00:23:12.682
That was it, that was the thought, anyway.

00:23:12.682 --> 00:23:13.105
So I told this story.

00:23:13.105 --> 00:23:18.183
I had told the story on one of my team calls and our social media managers were like that's got to go out there, cause now I don't care about anything anymore.

00:23:18.183 --> 00:23:19.890
Anybody, everybody, no, and it's so good.

00:23:19.930 --> 00:23:33.115
Like I'm obsessed with it because like literally not the action itself, but this like idea that like let's stop pretending like being a girl isn't the wildest trip you've ever.

00:23:33.115 --> 00:23:38.652
Like the boys get to be like farting, burping, scruffy fat.

00:23:38.652 --> 00:23:39.554
They have boobs.

00:23:39.554 --> 00:23:40.846
They're bald on my hinge.

00:23:40.846 --> 00:23:42.246
They're doing all this crazy stuff.

00:23:42.246 --> 00:23:54.957
They're bald on my hinge and we're like quote have to be like demure and mindful and I'm like, wait a minute, wait a minute, that's yeah, we got the show, what.

00:23:54.957 --> 00:24:07.763
And then they're all like always, always the most disgusting, like average 60 year old white male is like I want a girl who works out, who takes care of herself, who has her own goals.

00:24:07.763 --> 00:24:12.946
I'm like, so what you're saying is I need to spend all my time working out, all my money on myself.

00:24:12.946 --> 00:24:15.404
I have to have my own money Cook clean.

00:24:15.914 --> 00:24:16.200
Cook clean.

00:24:16.200 --> 00:24:20.750
Yep, I have to have my own money because you're not going to, but I still have to.

00:24:20.750 --> 00:24:23.325
Like, do you know how much it costs to be a girl?

00:24:24.647 --> 00:24:26.491
Same yeah, that's how they.

00:24:27.181 --> 00:24:43.285
And then you're going to sit here and say it with your like coleslaw-looking face and your boobs that come in, and it still says and then it still says I'm trying to figure out my relationship goals and I'm like, sir, your testosterone is gone, your boobs are in, your belly is huge.

00:24:43.285 --> 00:24:48.065
Mine says that I love McDonald's because it triggers them, so it actually helps us.

00:24:48.065 --> 00:24:48.767
Jenny wrote it.

00:24:48.767 --> 00:24:52.582
So it says McDonald's is life, because I actually love McDonald's.

00:24:52.582 --> 00:25:01.101
But it says I love a nice dinner out, I love a great bottle of wine, but sometimes you just have to hit the drive through for a double and get back to chasing your dreams.

00:25:01.643 --> 00:25:08.229
And I cannot tell you how many men will take the time to actually comment about how triggered they are about it.

00:25:08.229 --> 00:25:10.586
And I'm like what's so triggering about it?

00:25:10.586 --> 00:25:11.529
I don't know.

00:25:11.529 --> 00:25:14.609
They're like do you know what's going to happen to you as you age?

00:25:14.609 --> 00:25:17.971
One person said you'd be a lot prettier if you didn't eat McDonald's.

00:25:17.971 --> 00:25:30.855
One person said I shared it on Instagram the other day but he was like first I'd like to have a conversation about how unhealthy that is, and then after, maybe I'll take you to dinner.

00:25:30.855 --> 00:25:45.557
And I was like you're going to sit me down as a five, three, 62 year old man, you're going to sit me down and tell me about my like bad behavior, basically, and then you're going to think about whether or not I've, like earned a dinner after.

00:25:45.577 --> 00:25:50.038
I don't think so and I'm sure he drinks an entire 12 pack of miller lights on the weekend.

00:25:50.058 --> 00:25:53.894
But right on your right right, but I'm like I just get the double.

00:25:53.894 --> 00:25:56.460
It's 100 beef, it's 20 grams of protein.

00:25:56.460 --> 00:25:58.663
It's like the most I.

00:25:58.663 --> 00:26:01.616
It's literally 340 calories in 20 grams of protein.

00:26:01.616 --> 00:26:04.223
It's better than any of those fake bars you can get.

00:26:04.746 --> 00:26:07.663
Yeah, also, just like whatever Ew.

00:26:09.238 --> 00:26:09.417
Do you?

00:26:09.498 --> 00:26:10.260
respond back.

00:26:10.260 --> 00:26:11.443
Do you respond back?

00:26:11.523 --> 00:26:14.843
This would be no because if I respond back I have to match to them.

00:26:14.843 --> 00:26:24.757
So I actually I know, and I actually really don't use my hinge right now, but I have the thing paid until the middle of October because of how I bought the thing.

00:26:24.757 --> 00:26:29.417
So sometimes I just go on for content, but every time I go on I'm like ugh, I hate it.

00:26:29.417 --> 00:26:30.300
Here it's so gross.

00:26:30.340 --> 00:26:31.464
It's very entertaining.

00:26:31.775 --> 00:26:37.676
Yes, I definitely like I let my friends on it actually a lot because they're like what is it like out there?

00:26:37.676 --> 00:26:42.705
I'm like here you go, yeah, because I don't hit the X and I don't match them.

00:26:42.705 --> 00:26:49.006
Now I just leave them in the middle so that when I'm with my girlfriends they can be like what is this land?

00:26:49.006 --> 00:26:50.958
I'm like it's not a place I like to go, it's not good.

00:26:51.398 --> 00:26:52.182
It's not good.

00:26:52.963 --> 00:26:57.941
I don't spend much time there, not into it, but yeah, they will show you their triggers.

00:26:57.941 --> 00:27:01.978
Like they literally will say you'd be a lot prettier if you didn't eat McDonald's, oh.

00:27:01.978 --> 00:27:04.535
And then it will say, figuring, you'd be a lot prettier if you didn't eat McDonald's, oh, wow.

00:27:04.535 --> 00:27:09.688
And then it will say, figuring out my relationship goals, sir.

00:27:10.935 --> 00:27:13.023
So this okay.

00:27:13.023 --> 00:27:15.382
So I've gone viral a couple times in the last month.

00:27:15.382 --> 00:27:23.161
Yes and same it brings out the trolls I did.

00:27:23.161 --> 00:27:34.884
Speaking of triggering the men, I did one with my husband with the very demure trend where I was explaining to him People did get really mad about that Girl and I wasn't even in your DMs, I could see it in your comments.

00:27:34.944 --> 00:27:36.028
People got real mad.

00:27:36.414 --> 00:27:37.196
Wait, what was it?

00:27:37.196 --> 00:27:37.919
I haven't seen it?

00:27:38.119 --> 00:27:49.526
Okay, so it's just a video where I'm explaining to him how to wipe up the countertop, which is actually, if you know, our marriage very funny, because I am the messy, hot mess in the relationship and my husband is like type A and everything is perfect and together.

00:27:49.795 --> 00:27:51.599
And the only reason our life runs is because of him.

00:27:51.599 --> 00:27:53.726
I love that.

00:27:53.726 --> 00:27:54.227
I feel that.

00:27:54.227 --> 00:27:57.384
I feel that deep in my soul you need one.

00:27:57.384 --> 00:28:01.780
Somebody has to have it together, so anyway.

00:28:01.780 --> 00:28:04.907
So it was just like a funny joke, right?

00:28:04.907 --> 00:28:13.257
Same thing, Rebecca.

00:28:13.257 --> 00:28:15.003
To have a woman telling a man to clean up after himself was so deeply triggering.

00:28:15.003 --> 00:28:19.080
I cannot tell you the crazy things that men said to me on that post, and it was so fun for me.

00:28:19.080 --> 00:28:20.747
This is why I was like what do you say back?

00:28:20.747 --> 00:28:25.140
Because I had a fucking blast saying things back to them.

00:28:25.520 --> 00:28:26.523
Well, it's engagement.

00:28:26.523 --> 00:28:31.080
So you're like, by the way, the entire point of my page is engagement.

00:28:31.080 --> 00:28:36.375
So all you are doing and I love, I love, love, love.

00:28:36.375 --> 00:28:39.925
When people show me their trigger, I'm like you just made our relationship so much easier.

00:28:39.925 --> 00:28:42.788
Because if it's like a trigger, I have great, we're in this forever.

00:28:42.788 --> 00:28:44.095
And if it's like a trigger, I have great, we're in this forever.

00:28:44.095 --> 00:28:49.477
And if it's like a trigger I don't have, I'm like, oh, that's a tell you're like no, I've had, I've had, I have enough triggers.

00:28:49.497 --> 00:28:52.463
I don't know why do they follow you if they're so triggered.

00:28:52.463 --> 00:28:56.801
Well, they don't, because that's the viral because it went viral so they would like okay

00:28:57.222 --> 00:28:58.666
so it's not okay, got it?

00:28:58.666 --> 00:28:59.875
Yeah, yeah, no, they don't follow.

00:28:59.875 --> 00:29:00.895
Yeah, no, yeah.

00:29:00.895 --> 00:29:06.398
I have like like two grown women like hardcore fighting on another one of my posts right now with each other and I'm like have at it, girls.

00:29:06.398 --> 00:29:09.901
You just tell on Instagram.

00:29:12.061 --> 00:29:14.544
I'm interesting.

00:29:14.544 --> 00:29:20.307
Thank you so much, making me crazy.

00:29:20.307 --> 00:29:25.348
And when I turned it off it went double, like overnight, what it was.

00:29:25.348 --> 00:29:31.492
I was like, oh my God, now cause you guys can't say anything, now you're going twice as crazy.

00:29:31.492 --> 00:29:32.973
Like what is it?

00:29:39.154 --> 00:29:39.916
And it was over my daughter's name.

00:29:39.916 --> 00:29:41.721
It was like a very simple one where, like, I showed basically what her.

00:29:41.721 --> 00:29:44.088
I turned her Yeti and I showed what it looked like at the end of the school year.

00:29:44.088 --> 00:29:44.490
Basically what her.

00:29:44.490 --> 00:29:46.295
I turned her Yeti and I showed what it looked like at the end of the school year.

00:29:46.295 --> 00:29:56.053
And somehow it's my youngest, so her name's Summit, had gotten her hands on this decal of a goat which is funny because the acronym is greatest of all time and slapped it over her name.

00:29:56.053 --> 00:30:02.596
And the thing for a Yeti, a year old, it looked like we had just dragged it behind our car for the entire school year.

00:30:02.596 --> 00:30:04.861
Like how did you do this?

00:30:04.861 --> 00:30:07.586
So like showed the goat thing.

00:30:07.586 --> 00:30:14.746
So I was talking about how she is and like her confidence and people were like basically it was over her name.

00:30:14.746 --> 00:30:20.173
So that's why I turned the commenting off, because it was making me crazy and then they were like fighting.

00:30:20.295 --> 00:30:22.205
But then I was like, how are you getting?

00:30:22.205 --> 00:30:25.459
Then it went into my dms and they were like you're winning.

00:30:25.459 --> 00:30:25.739
You.

00:30:25.739 --> 00:30:27.983
Goats are used in sacrifice.

00:30:27.983 --> 00:30:30.115
Like she covered her you gave her.

00:30:30.115 --> 00:30:36.037
Oh my god, we're like we're gonna report you to child protective services because you gave her the name, come it.

00:30:36.037 --> 00:30:39.022
And I was like what is even why go to town?

00:30:39.022 --> 00:30:43.338
You would you never know when it's gonna happen, though it's like the most random.

00:30:43.338 --> 00:30:48.307
I mean, I know men are very easily triggered only from my hinge.

00:30:48.307 --> 00:30:51.880
So maybe that's like, maybe that is the new social media strategy.

00:30:51.880 --> 00:30:53.505
How do you trigger the?

00:30:53.545 --> 00:30:54.307
boys.

00:30:54.307 --> 00:30:57.479
We do it now, we will are my social media team will.

00:30:57.479 --> 00:31:01.556
No, I mean, like we don't do it on purpose, but we will be like, oh, this is going to trigger the guys.

00:31:01.596 --> 00:31:08.247
This will be good, yep like who has that much time to like sit there and be an ass, thank you.

00:31:08.247 --> 00:31:10.210
Like like go do man things.

00:31:10.516 --> 00:31:13.682
No, but that's like the men, right, they just are constantly like they.

00:31:13.682 --> 00:31:16.696
It's so important for their opinion to count.

00:31:17.057 --> 00:31:42.861
I mean, I hate to say that, but like I do notice very much that, like, women are a lot more careful about like making sure that you are heard where men need to be heard and I'm like I've seen these really funny tiktoks, jenny, another reason for you to get on tiktok um that have said like um, y'all need to go back to war, like you've had too much time out of war.

00:31:42.861 --> 00:31:44.766
Y'all used to go back to war Like you've had too much time out of war.

00:31:44.766 --> 00:31:51.424
Y'all used to be fighting wars, building things, making things, writing notes, home, right, and now you're just attacking women on social media.

00:31:51.474 --> 00:31:56.423
Like we need to go send you back to a war you should be gone for six months at a time.

00:31:56.694 --> 00:31:58.482
Some notes should come in the mail.

00:31:58.482 --> 00:32:01.303
You should die thinking about me.

00:32:03.905 --> 00:32:04.327
Like come on.

00:32:07.315 --> 00:32:13.507
Now you're just like split the date, even though it cost me 700 to show up here between my hair, my nails, my makeup, my perfume.

00:32:13.507 --> 00:32:15.135
No, they want to split the date.

00:32:15.135 --> 00:32:15.738
That's true.

00:32:15.738 --> 00:32:17.402
Oh yeah, that's like a thing for sure.

00:32:17.402 --> 00:32:19.968
I mean, it hasn't happened about it.

00:32:19.968 --> 00:32:24.507
Yeah, yeah, they're obvious about it, because they think they think that they're testing you.

00:32:24.507 --> 00:32:27.344
This is why I don't like hinge, is why I actually really don't use mine.

00:32:27.344 --> 00:32:39.182
I feel like the male psyche about hinge is like always looking for the next best thing, cause you see them on there for like really long term.

00:32:39.182 --> 00:32:57.080
Like I could like show it to a friend who was single two years ago and she'd be like, oh my gosh, those same guys were there and I'm like they're just looking for like something younger, prettier, whatever, and they're like that's why it says figuring out their older and fatter and more disgusting, and I think it's that it's Charles.

00:32:57.336 --> 00:33:00.840
I don't know if it's everywhere but I mean it's freaking.

00:33:00.840 --> 00:33:04.772
Girl to guy ratio is like 1 to 12 or whatever.

00:33:04.772 --> 00:33:06.195
I mean, it's something insane.

00:33:06.195 --> 00:33:09.801
Yes, they've got the like the pick of the litter here.

00:33:10.363 --> 00:33:14.855
Yeah, yeah which is why we don't use my hinge.

00:33:14.895 --> 00:33:30.483
We just use it for like over drinks yeah, we like it for the content, yeah yeah, or I'll get like you know, like they're really really really young boys like I like them for you hey that rebecca it will be like.

00:33:30.723 --> 00:33:38.138
So I'm like, sir, you're below my weight class that bothers her more than the age.

00:33:38.579 --> 00:33:43.548
yeah, I'm like me too, me too, we cannot be in the same weight class.

00:33:43.748 --> 00:33:45.349
I know what I'm coming in at.

00:33:45.349 --> 00:33:48.528
I'm going to need you to come in.

00:33:48.528 --> 00:33:49.375
We cannot A lot more.

00:33:49.375 --> 00:33:51.361
My biceps cannot be bigger than yours.

00:33:51.361 --> 00:33:52.384
I'm freaking out.

00:33:52.384 --> 00:33:53.306
There's no way.

00:33:55.496 --> 00:33:55.999
No, that would.

00:33:55.999 --> 00:33:57.819
What am I going to teach you?

00:33:57.819 --> 00:33:57.921
How?

00:33:57.941 --> 00:34:00.640
to drive first, literally and figuratively?

00:34:00.640 --> 00:34:03.817
I don't think so 21 and up.

00:34:03.898 --> 00:34:06.699
I don't think it's that bad for you no, this I like literally.

00:34:06.719 --> 00:34:07.440
There's a new one.

00:34:07.440 --> 00:34:10.065
That's like literally just so little.

00:34:10.065 --> 00:34:11.898
And because he did the rose, it's at the top.

00:34:11.898 --> 00:34:14.465
So whenever I open, I'm like, well, I gotta get rid of this app.

00:34:14.465 --> 00:34:20.963
Like I feel like, although on mom talk, he would be married with two kids.

00:34:21.865 --> 00:34:23.608
Okay, so Sarah has not watched it.

00:34:23.608 --> 00:34:24.891
She watched one episode.

00:34:25.215 --> 00:34:27.043
I watched like this much, but I'm going to do it again.

00:34:27.043 --> 00:34:27.576
I'm finishing.

00:34:27.576 --> 00:34:28.858
Love is Blind UK right now.

00:34:28.858 --> 00:34:30.260
I'm sitting down.

00:34:30.260 --> 00:34:31.161
I love this blind girl.

00:34:32.483 --> 00:34:33.684
Obsessed.

00:34:33.684 --> 00:34:35.226
Okay, obsessed.

00:34:35.527 --> 00:34:36.268
Did you watch UK?

00:34:36.268 --> 00:34:39.601
Yes, oh my God, can we talk about Freddie for a moment?

00:34:44.074 --> 00:34:45.356
I did watch the first five episodes, so I do know who freddie is.

00:34:45.356 --> 00:34:46.519
He's the funeral director, right?

00:34:46.800 --> 00:34:59.076
yeah, yes we did a podcast like three or four episodes ago and we had the same conversation and the next day my husband was like so you have a thing for freddie huh.

00:34:59.076 --> 00:35:04.326
And I'm like, uh-huh, I think pretty much every girl in the world has a thing for Freddie.

00:35:04.626 --> 00:35:05.208
Are you kidding?

00:35:05.909 --> 00:35:08.041
Why it should be illegal.

00:35:08.835 --> 00:35:13.726
And he's just so sweet and he's so nice and he's funny and he's like.

00:35:13.726 --> 00:35:17.362
Adorable and with the accent and the body oh.

00:35:17.402 --> 00:35:19.860
Becca, I would hop on a flight like I.

00:35:19.922 --> 00:35:22.844
Literally, I got through the first five but then I didn't like where that was going.

00:35:22.844 --> 00:35:30.931
So I was like you know, I've actually when jenny first had me watch, it was a different, it was like the last american version and I don't know why I thought this.

00:35:30.931 --> 00:35:37.746
But I actually thought they were going to be blind, probably because I typically watch things like love on the spectrum.

00:35:37.746 --> 00:35:44.367
And so when I signed on and I was like, oh my God, wait, what?

00:35:44.367 --> 00:35:45.389
I was like what.

00:35:45.389 --> 00:35:50.382
And then I was like this is kind of like hinge dating, like you don't get to see anyone.

00:35:50.382 --> 00:35:54.701
You like have these conversations, and you're like, is this worth it?

00:35:54.701 --> 00:35:57.605
Oh my God, yeah, I thought they were going to be blind.

00:35:58.465 --> 00:35:59.608
Yeah, new season's coming out.

00:35:59.608 --> 00:36:00.588
What Like next week?

00:36:01.110 --> 00:36:02.356
I'm so excited I need to finish.

00:36:02.356 --> 00:36:03.300
So I need to finish.

00:36:03.300 --> 00:36:04.123
Love is blind UK.

00:36:04.123 --> 00:36:08.335
Then I will do mom talk, then we can talk about mom talk and then yep, I'll do that too.

00:36:08.376 --> 00:36:11.242
I mean the mom talk thing is it's only like eight or nine episodes.

00:36:11.242 --> 00:36:16.858
It's totally um, I mean it's, it's toxic, right, like it.

00:36:16.858 --> 00:36:19.125
In best case scenario it's all toxic.

00:36:19.125 --> 00:36:20.956
Like the friendships are toxic, the whole thing.

00:36:20.956 --> 00:36:32.197
But, like it, the deep look into the way that they're like, I'm going to say, exploiting that whole situation is what's blowing my mind the most.

00:36:32.197 --> 00:36:42.286
Yeah, I'm like they're nowhere near some of the stuff that they're doing, not even just like sexually, just in their lives where relationships or jail or whatever.

00:36:42.286 --> 00:36:50.523
I'm like lives where relationships or jail or whatever I'm like how, how are you doing this?

00:36:50.523 --> 00:36:51.606
I don't get it Convinced, her.

00:36:51.606 --> 00:36:52.429
Okay, so we have Queefgate.

00:36:52.429 --> 00:36:56.380
You do the yoga thing and at the time you were going to be a yoga instructor, right?

00:36:56.981 --> 00:37:00.829
I taught for six months and teaching yoga was not for me.

00:37:01.394 --> 00:37:15.380
Okay, but this is what I wanted we want to talk about because, like, one of our like most listened to episodes is this conversation that we had early on about like failure, and I know from like watching you on Instagram like I.

00:37:15.461 --> 00:37:23.648
Just, first of all, I think failure is the reason we don't start a lot of things and then, as women, it's looked, certainly if we fail or like flail, essentially like we get a lot of things.

00:37:23.648 --> 00:37:41.021
And then, as women, it's looked, certainly if we fail or like flail, essentially like we get a lot of feedback and so we tend to not do it, but, like we all know as business owners and entrepreneurs, like you're going to have to flail and fail a little, you're going to have to clean a lot, you're going to have to, and it's going to be ugly someday.

00:37:41.021 --> 00:37:45.307
So I was like let's have this conversation about like it.

00:37:45.307 --> 00:37:56.208
Really that might not be the end, that might be the end of that journey or that project or even that episode, but like the fail is not the end, that's just part of it.

00:37:56.208 --> 00:37:57.317
So I want to talk about that.

00:37:57.317 --> 00:37:59.001
It's a six month.

00:37:59.001 --> 00:38:00.463
You're a yoga teacher.

00:38:00.483 --> 00:38:02.148
I was a yoga teacher for six months.

00:38:02.148 --> 00:38:03.248
Listen, I was young.

00:38:03.248 --> 00:38:03.889
I was not.

00:38:03.889 --> 00:38:04.548
I mean God.

00:38:04.548 --> 00:38:05.469
How old was I in 20?

00:38:05.489 --> 00:38:06.489
I mean, I love yoga.

00:38:06.550 --> 00:38:08.831
I feel like I would really enjoy taking a class from you.

00:38:08.831 --> 00:38:09.791
Oh, thank you.

00:38:09.791 --> 00:38:14.637
I actually think I'd be a great teacher now, but I didn't have the confidence for it and I was so insecure.

00:38:15.259 --> 00:38:22.126
And when you put like a 25-year-old insecure girl who just queefed in front of everybody and is horrified because everybody's out farted.

00:38:22.126 --> 00:38:30.181
I was so in my own head that I felt like I couldn't give people the right, Like it should be about the people taking the class, not about me.

00:38:30.181 --> 00:38:36.451
But I was so in my own head that I couldn't actually enjoy the experience and it was the first time I had gone out.

00:38:36.451 --> 00:38:42.425
I paid $1,800 for this training which, like at that time in my life, was so much money you know.

00:38:43.807 --> 00:38:47.864
And then I failed and I was like, shoot like this sucks right.

00:38:47.864 --> 00:38:59.847
And so I had to tell my family, my friends, everybody who I had been so excited to tell that I was becoming a yoga teacher, that I wasn't a yoga teacher and I always had this like fire somewhere in me to work for myself.

00:38:59.847 --> 00:39:07.451
I didn't have the confidence in it, but, like I always kind of knew I wanted to be helping people in a deeper way, I just didn't know what that was going to look like.

00:39:07.451 --> 00:39:09.277
So I thought it was yoga, and then it wasn't.

00:39:09.277 --> 00:39:11.545
And then I thought it was being a health coach, and then it wasn't.

00:39:11.545 --> 00:39:13.097
And then I joined an MLM and it wasn't.

00:39:13.117 --> 00:39:21.608
And so by the time I found virtual assisting, which was my gateway into what I do now, I was embarrassed to tell people that I was doing a four right.

00:39:21.608 --> 00:39:29.963
Like this was my fourth thing that I was doing right, and my husband is my biggest cheerleader of all the cheerleaders in life and he was even like, are we sure?

00:39:29.963 --> 00:39:31.581
Like this is another thing we're doing right.

00:39:31.581 --> 00:39:40.159
So when I started my business as a VA, I was working full time and I had a 16 month old, and when the business started taking off.

00:39:40.159 --> 00:39:52.266
When the first person paid me to do work for a stranger in my house, I was like whoa, I think it's working, because everything else I had done before I had not made much money at all, if any.

00:39:52.266 --> 00:39:57.405
Yeah, and it was working, and it worked so fast and that was beautiful.

00:39:57.534 --> 00:40:03.175
And now, with all that hindsight, I'm like gosh, those three things that failed before were the reason that the fourth thing was successful.

00:40:03.175 --> 00:40:04.784
But it never feels like that at the time.

00:40:04.784 --> 00:40:09.601
It just feels like I'm an idiot and I'm not good at doing anything.

00:40:09.601 --> 00:40:16.447
And why am I going to be doomed to work for somebody else for the rest of my life when I know that that's not for me right Now, looking back, it's different.

00:40:16.447 --> 00:40:17.757
But yeah, those were.

00:40:17.757 --> 00:40:19.438
They were not enjoyable at the time at all.

00:40:19.438 --> 00:40:22.664
They're a cute little rap bow story now, but they were not at the time.

00:40:22.764 --> 00:40:51.159
No, no, I know, and I feel like, as I don't know if it's like the way we're conditioned, but maybe I'm wrong but I feel like, as women, we're very quick to feel shame, Like just the tiniest thing could happen and we're like, well, my God, that's not for me, I'm deaf Like there's no way you're going to come out of the gates and be successful.

00:40:51.159 --> 00:40:54.670
Like you're actually going to have to push for that and you are going to have to embarrass yourself Like, jokes aside, but like you're going to have to.

00:40:54.670 --> 00:41:06.847
And the other thing that I've learned in all of these journeys and I'm sure I'm going to fail more in the future is, like the people who are going to be your biggest supporters and we'll take husbands out of this, because I don't have one and they're okay to feel like.

00:41:06.847 --> 00:41:13.978
They're always going to question like their providers, right, or they're supposed to be, so they're always going to have question about, like, what this really all means.

00:41:13.978 --> 00:41:21.885
But like the people who came out of the gates and supported me in any of the things weren't my circle first.

00:41:22.527 --> 00:41:33.742
The podcast has been different, but even for, like the marketing company, it's typically people who are complete strangers, or even the Instagram or whatever, who are the first to be like oh my gosh, I love your content.

00:41:33.742 --> 00:41:39.985
Or oh my gosh, I look forward to this every day, or like whatever big hype it is.

00:41:39.985 --> 00:41:41.487
They aren't necessarily like.

00:41:41.487 --> 00:41:46.280
The people around you are being more careful and then you're being am I failing?

00:41:46.280 --> 00:41:47.121
Do I have shame?

00:41:47.121 --> 00:41:49.085
How do I feel Like I'm scared?

00:41:49.085 --> 00:41:53.320
And then it's the strangers who are like I'll buy it, I'm in.

00:41:53.320 --> 00:41:55.545
Yeah, it's just the weirdest.

00:41:55.545 --> 00:41:59.559
I don't know why it's so hard in so many ways, but it is.

00:42:00.422 --> 00:42:36.159
Yeah, I think sometimes you know, especially for the way, for the way that you guys run, you know what you do, right, there's so much authenticity in it, um, and in a world of social media where everything feels so polished and pretty and tied up into a bowl, a bow, a bowl, um, when you are authentic, when you talk about you know queefing, when you talk about farting, when you talk about your hinge stories, when you talk about the fact that you love McDonald's, right, Like, even the simple things like that, people feel really seen in it and I think that makes an immediate connection.

00:42:36.340 --> 00:42:40.278
And that's why, like you know, I shared Queefgate and you guys were like, oh my God, we love her, right, like.

00:42:40.278 --> 00:42:40.800
But why?

00:42:40.800 --> 00:42:41.141
Why?

00:42:41.141 --> 00:42:53.818
Because I was just an honest, authentic person and I wasn't trying to pretend like weird shit hasn't come out of my body too, but there's so few people that are having that conversation that it means something to us, right, and then we want more from that person.

00:42:53.818 --> 00:43:03.163
And so I think, like to y'all, kudos for doing that, and also, people will continue to be that for you, because you're going to continue to be that for them.

00:43:03.163 --> 00:43:04.324
It gives them courage.

00:43:04.344 --> 00:43:18.228
Well, I feel like it removes the shame stigma, even for your own self, because you're like well, it's kind of like driving through a drive-thru and then eating like five Big Macs by the dumpster and then throwing your bag out and you're like that's not for me.

00:43:18.228 --> 00:43:30.097
I'd much rather tell everyone I just did this because, for some reason and I don't know what, if something's wrong with me or if everything's right, but I'm like I got to tell people, I got to get it off my chest.

00:43:30.097 --> 00:43:31.782
I don't want to hold onto it.

00:43:31.782 --> 00:43:49.958
Yeah, holding onto it even like you know, for lack of a better example, like the end of my marriage, like holding onto that Cause I needed to at the time for my kids was very hard and keeping it close to me and like it's not because I feel the need to go out and say like, oh, my first husband was this and this and this.

00:43:50.199 --> 00:43:55.798
I just don't like to keep things like that, like I'm just not everything in a pretty little box, like hidden.

00:43:55.798 --> 00:43:57.724
I do much better.

00:43:57.724 --> 00:44:01.840
I flourish when I can just be like whoa, I totally railed the curve on the way here.

00:44:01.840 --> 00:44:20.679
Or actually, looking back, this was a red flag that I thought was cute and actually isn't that cute now that we're in it or like whatever it is, like I just do, or like I just had two doubles and not one, and so I have 40 grams of protein and a lot of McDonald's on deck.

00:44:22.682 --> 00:44:27.597
It helps, like make your circle smaller, almost because you just find your people.

00:44:27.597 --> 00:44:28.460
You know Cause?

00:44:28.460 --> 00:44:39.778
I mean, I've had a few comments it's like, oh, your podcast is a lot, or it's like, well then, you just don't get it, you don't get me, you don't get us, and we are a lot, but that's the point.

00:44:39.938 --> 00:44:43.565
But we're definitely not making it a lot, we're literally showing up.

00:44:43.565 --> 00:44:45.369
This is just us Right, yep.

00:44:46.275 --> 00:44:56.385
But people, a lot of people, get used to you being, or they want you to be, perfectly polished with a bow, and when you're not, they're like oh, I don't like that at all.

00:44:56.385 --> 00:44:58.784
Like that is way too uncomfortable for me.

00:44:59.735 --> 00:45:01.141
And you hit the nail on the head, right.

00:45:01.141 --> 00:45:09.880
The only reason they don't like it is because it's triggering something in them.

00:45:09.880 --> 00:45:12.971
It actually has nothing to do with you, it has everything to do with them, and you just made them feel some kind of way, right?

00:45:12.971 --> 00:45:16.139
Yep, and that's why they say that I love the trigger.

00:45:16.659 --> 00:45:21.940
I feel like we need to move on from what women should be and just let them be.

00:45:21.960 --> 00:45:22.300
Damn.

00:45:22.300 --> 00:45:26.998
I know, know we should call this podcast trigger warning.

00:45:26.998 --> 00:45:34.259
We started off talking about like I got and like if I'm the person who we talked about this a few podcasts ago.

00:45:34.259 --> 00:45:45.199
But like if I think for a second to, if I think for a second that you aren't my people or you're not going to like me, that is the time I'll actually play into it just a little bit.

00:45:45.199 --> 00:46:13.960
Like I'll push a little bit further to see if I can trigger you, not because I'm trying to play games, but I'm like if, for some reason, this conversation feels like I can't trust you or feels like you have whatever, I'd rather you and I both see it fast so we don't waste any time trying to pretend to be, because I know myself, I know I can be outrageous and like not in an obnoxious way, but I definitely know I'm gonna at some point eat tacos upside down in your car.

00:46:14.561 --> 00:46:35.786
So if, for some reason, my love of fast food or the diet soda or the mom talk or whatever it is is going to trigger you, like I'm an oldest born daughter, like firstborn, oldest, two younger, bigger brothers, like I've been through it, I'd rather know now Same.

00:46:35.786 --> 00:46:38.498
Like if you don't believe in me if you don't believe in my business.

00:46:38.498 --> 00:46:47.407
Um, if you don't think I'm funny, cause I'm not doing things to be funny, but if you don't think it's your kind of humor, don't stay, honestly just don't, yeah Make it easy.

00:46:47.427 --> 00:46:48.755
Jenny, are you the oldest daughter?

00:46:49.376 --> 00:46:49.657
I am.

00:46:50.619 --> 00:46:51.802
We're three oldest daughters.

00:46:53.505 --> 00:46:57.478
Yeah, is that why we're just like let the flag fly?

00:46:57.478 --> 00:47:00.503
Because we're just like hey, I've been through it.

00:47:01.304 --> 00:47:05.125
I don't know if this is y'all's story too, but, like I think, for a really long time I tried to keep it, are we going into?

00:47:05.125 --> 00:47:05.527
Triggers.

00:47:05.527 --> 00:47:09.061
We're back to triggers, obviously.

00:47:09.061 --> 00:47:12.257
You know, I think for a really long time I tried to keep everything in that box.

00:47:12.297 --> 00:47:26.722
I tried to make things pretty in a bow right, Like I was that person, and I think a lot of oldest daughters are that and then I just got to a point where, like almost exactly what you were saying, rebecca, like that just doesn't feel authentic to me, that doesn't feel good to me.

00:47:26.722 --> 00:47:29.519
Like I feel like, oh my God, if I'm not saying this thing.

00:47:29.519 --> 00:47:39.018
It's like the joke we always used to make is you know, a regular person, somebody comments or compliments, like their shoes or their clothes, and they say thank you so much, and I'm like, oh my God, thank you so much.

00:47:39.018 --> 00:47:39.818
I got it on sale.

00:47:39.818 --> 00:47:43.623
Did you know that if you Google this thing, you get a coupon and you can get it for 30% off too?

00:47:43.623 --> 00:47:46.208
Right, like I can't not say that.

00:47:46.407 --> 00:47:50.701
No, you can't say, and I think like that's the thing is.

00:47:50.701 --> 00:48:06.161
Like those oldest daughters are like yeah, we've done it this other way and it made us feel like shit, so like we're going to try something different now you know, and it's really interesting to see that show up as a pattern.

00:48:06.161 --> 00:48:07.706
I literally shared a handbag link at a gas station two days ago.

00:48:07.706 --> 00:48:08.248
Of course you did.

00:48:08.268 --> 00:48:09.813
The lady at the checkout was like I love your nail color.

00:48:09.813 --> 00:48:11.920
I was like, oh my gosh, let me tell you something.

00:48:11.920 --> 00:48:24.887
I just got these because I accidentally shot my hand in the dishwasher and I broke two, so I had to go back and I actually need a lot of leadership in my life so I actually let him pick out the nail color so I can even tell you what it is, and lot of leadership in my life, so I actually let him pick out the nail color so I can even tell you what it is.

00:48:24.887 --> 00:48:25.608
And then she was like I also I.

00:48:25.608 --> 00:48:26.929
She was like speaking of nice things, I really love your handbag.

00:48:26.929 --> 00:48:28.010
I was like it's not even that nice.

00:48:28.010 --> 00:48:29.692
I got it for $29 on Amazon.

00:48:29.692 --> 00:48:30.474
She's like stop.

00:48:30.474 --> 00:48:37.043
And I sent her the link and she like text back she's like bought it, clemens Ferry, we have the same handbag now.

00:48:37.063 --> 00:48:38.204
No one panicked.

00:48:45.335 --> 00:48:48.005
And she showed me her nails and three of them were broken in half.

00:48:48.005 --> 00:48:49.300
She goes we can't have nice things.

00:48:49.300 --> 00:48:53.643
I was like no words to kill her swift and it was a seven minute transaction.

00:48:53.643 --> 00:48:55.581
No one could go through the line.

00:48:55.581 --> 00:48:59.280
We were like firstborn daughter.

00:48:59.280 --> 00:49:00.581
I should have just said that.

00:49:00.581 --> 00:49:01.643
I've been like are you okay?

00:49:01.643 --> 00:49:02.103
I'm okay.

00:49:02.184 --> 00:49:02.885
I got you girl.

00:49:02.885 --> 00:49:04.047
Are you okay, Are we okay?

00:49:04.047 --> 00:49:05.108
We're going to be okay, right.

00:49:09.835 --> 00:49:10.175
But I do think.

00:49:10.175 --> 00:49:11.637
I think for a little bit we started shoving everything in the box.

00:49:11.637 --> 00:49:16.121
Then the lid didn't fit and then we started tripping over it and then we were like I can't actually do the box, the box does not work for me.

00:49:16.121 --> 00:49:22.548
I have, you know, maybe 40 years left and I don't want to be in the box anymore.

00:49:22.548 --> 00:49:38.108
I don't know if that was like the crossing over to 40 or what it was like for me specifically, or like figuring out the thing in my first marriage, but like now, I just I'd much rather you saw everything right up front so you could decide what your participation level was.

00:49:38.108 --> 00:49:43.000
And in the meantime, I'm going to invest in all of my people that I already know.

00:49:43.000 --> 00:49:48.367
And in the meantime, I'm going to invest in all of my people that I already know enjoy my presence or my company, or whatever it is.

00:49:49.289 --> 00:49:54.900
I love that so much, or my business I love that so much, it is fun working for yourself right.

00:49:55.902 --> 00:50:00.132
Oh my God, I cannot imagine, not For this exact reason.

00:50:00.132 --> 00:50:01.420
Right, like this is work.

00:50:01.420 --> 00:50:03.320
Right now, we got to talk about mom talk.

00:50:03.320 --> 00:50:04.523
What are they called Shushers?

00:50:04.523 --> 00:50:07.442
What was the person who jumped on Soaking Soakers?

00:50:07.442 --> 00:50:13.836
Soakers right, yeah, we've talked about oversharing triggers right, and like this is work when I?

00:50:13.836 --> 00:50:15.141
Just a quick side story.

00:50:15.722 --> 00:50:22.085
When I started my business, the thing to me that felt the most disingenuous was I felt like I had to be two different people in my life.

00:50:22.465 --> 00:50:36.327
I was the person who walked in the front door at work and put on the smile and pretended like everything was perfect and I didn't just, you know, yell at my husband that morning and I wasn't getting my period and feeling, you know, like a fat ass with pimples all over my face.

00:50:36.347 --> 00:50:45.869
Right, like I had to be a perfect person and walk in that door and everything had to be perfect, and then I could go home and I could be funny and I could be off color and off putting and I could take my bra off and I could be.

00:50:45.869 --> 00:51:05.231
You know what felt authentic and true to me, but I couldn't be that person at work, and so when I started my business, that was my promise to myself was that I was going to be able to be the same person, no matter what room I was in yeah, whether it was work or whether it was at home, and and that is something seven years later that I feel really proud of is that, like, I am the same person.

00:51:05.231 --> 00:51:16.273
I think you guys probably feel this way too, but if you're people who watch you on Instagram or follow your podcast and ever meet you in person, the highest compliment somebody ever gives me is oh my God, you're exactly the same person as you are online.

00:51:16.293 --> 00:51:18.663
Yeah, Because I'm like this is just me.

00:51:19.115 --> 00:51:20.340
Like I'm not putting on a front.

00:51:20.340 --> 00:51:24.242
I'm not like a different person you Like I'm not.

00:51:24.242 --> 00:51:24.496
I'm not putting on a front.

00:51:24.496 --> 00:51:24.831
I'm not like a different person.

00:51:24.831 --> 00:51:25.403
You don't get a different version of me.

00:51:25.403 --> 00:51:28.025
This is the exact same person, and I think there's so many beautiful parts of entrepreneurship and working for yourself.

00:51:28.025 --> 00:51:42.675
But, like for me, that is such a high one on that list because I just want to be my silly, quirky self and be accepted in those circles and to your point before Rebecca too, like and not accepted in other circles and not to be okay, yeah.

00:51:43.920 --> 00:51:55.047
Yeah, no, I think there's something really deeply satisfying whether you're accepted or not, about somebody being like you are exactly what I expected, andizant of that.

00:51:55.047 --> 00:52:20.161
But then I don't want to teach them how to navigate the way that we all learned how to be yourself Like I don't even know if it's age or just being an entrepreneur, if it's just this whole cauldron, for lack of a better cause.

00:52:20.161 --> 00:52:24.547
It's spooky season, like of just every little part of it.

00:52:24.547 --> 00:52:35.806
But I'm just like yes, that compliment of we get a lot of like it feels like you're at my kitchen table or it feels like you're in my car.

00:52:35.806 --> 00:52:37.291
So we know that what we're saying is also resonating with other people.

00:52:37.291 --> 00:52:48.652
But then for them to be like that is such a Becca thing to say or such a Jenny thing to say, or you're exactly the same as you are online, I'm like you're welcome, but really I'm saying that to myself.

00:52:49.393 --> 00:52:49.893
Like.

00:52:50.315 --> 00:52:53.077
I, it's not even that we're like, you're like.

00:52:53.077 --> 00:52:57.768
So the other thing that's really weird being a woman is like you feel weird being proud of yourself.

00:52:57.768 --> 00:53:06.068
So we're kind of taught that like humble is like but I'm, I think you can be humble and be proud of yourself Like that's okay.

00:53:06.068 --> 00:53:09.373
Humble and be proud of yourself like that's okay.

00:53:09.373 --> 00:53:21.663
Do you have a few where you're like it's a little scary to not always be thinking about your own feedback to yourself or like what you would have done differently, or all this like constant thought process of like how to be better.

00:53:23.307 --> 00:53:28.902
Okay, so I'm going to tell you a funny story about the word humble and, like my experience with that, Okay.

00:53:28.902 --> 00:53:29.041
Yes.

00:53:29.041 --> 00:53:32.309
So, my husband is not an entrepreneur.

00:53:32.309 --> 00:53:38.789
He is in corporate America, okay, and he is obviously not my ideal target in my business.

00:53:38.789 --> 00:53:44.420
And he's also not on my husband's, on no social media, so like he doesn't know shit about what happens.

00:53:44.500 --> 00:53:46.907
I love this I love that, okay.

00:53:46.907 --> 00:53:53.702
But what he is on is my email list and so he will sometimes read my emails and if it's a really good one, he'll respond back and be like that was really good, right.

00:53:53.702 --> 00:54:03.887
And we were sitting in the bathroom one day and he had just mentioned something that he had read or something that he really liked that I did in the business, and he was like you're so smart, like you're so good at this, and I looked at him and I said thank you, I know.

00:54:03.887 --> 00:54:06.711
And he was like wow, not so humble are we?

00:54:06.711 --> 00:54:13.481
And I was like no, like no, I'm not humble.

00:54:13.501 --> 00:54:14.565
I don't need to pretend like I don't think I'm smart.

00:54:14.565 --> 00:54:16.797
I don't need to pretend like I haven't just done this for seven years and made millions of dollars.

00:54:16.797 --> 00:54:18.742
Thank you so much out of nothing.

00:54:18.742 --> 00:54:31.313
Right, like I started with no dollars, no clients, no experience, like every single one of us does, and as a woman who barely graduated college you can ask Whitney, she will tell you I was not a good student ever, so I always had this belief that I was not smart.

00:54:31.414 --> 00:54:31.673
Right?

00:54:31.673 --> 00:54:32.815
I'm seven years in.

00:54:32.815 --> 00:54:39.442
I've done all these incredible things.

00:54:39.442 --> 00:54:40.204
I think I'm a real fucking genius.

00:54:40.204 --> 00:54:40.945
So the humble has left the building.

00:54:40.945 --> 00:54:41.346
Now am I an asshole?

00:54:41.346 --> 00:54:44.340
No, would I look down upon somebody else who is not at that level?

00:54:44.340 --> 00:54:47.025
Absolutely not, because I've been in all those levels before too.

00:54:47.025 --> 00:54:53.494
But I don't feel like I need to downplay it anymore because I just want to own that.

00:54:53.494 --> 00:55:06.831
I know my shit and I'm kind of good at this, and I thought it was just so interesting how my husband was so put off by me being like thanks and I know, but if you were a man, it would be completely funny.

00:55:07.550 --> 00:55:09.693
So I'm like, wait a minute, why do we?

00:55:09.693 --> 00:55:21.742
Why can't we say, like, why does it have to be in a little skirt suit with the high stiletto and the curled hair and all the things for you to be like, uh, I like it, I like it.

00:55:21.742 --> 00:55:24.684
I'm like, wait a minute, wait a minute, you could never, they could never, and I don't mean that in any sort of way.

00:55:24.684 --> 00:55:25.583
But if we asked a man, I like it.

00:55:25.583 --> 00:55:31.387
I'm like, wait a minute, wait a minute, you could never, they could never, and I don't mean that in any sort of way.

00:55:31.387 --> 00:55:50.644
But if we asked a man to get his hair done and his nails done and do his makeup before he left the house and do all the things and then squeeze into the pencil skirt and then try to give the message to a woman full of the opposite sex and then nail it, no, no no, no, while have climbed, we're also being the primary caretaker.

00:55:51.126 --> 00:55:58.987
Yes, that's the part that gets me the most we have climbed with our crazy nails all the way to any accolade.

00:55:59.449 --> 00:56:01.672
Have you heard the story of why I have pointy nails?

00:56:01.672 --> 00:56:09.721
A nail tech, like literally four years ago, told me I had fat sausage fingers and it was because I had.

00:56:09.721 --> 00:56:12.487
She goes do you see this?

00:56:12.487 --> 00:56:13.628
This is before they were.

00:56:13.628 --> 00:56:15.472
She was like fat, fat.

00:56:15.472 --> 00:56:19.347
She's like I'm going to make them look nice and she like put tips on.

00:56:19.347 --> 00:56:28.152
And now every time I break one, I'm like Ooh, she's actually not wrong, like they're very sausagey if they're squared off.

00:56:28.152 --> 00:56:34.289
But she was like not demure, basically Not demure, not mindful.

00:56:34.329 --> 00:56:37.981
But also guess who doesn't ever have to deal with that?

00:56:37.981 --> 00:56:41.688
Right, my husband clips his nails over the toilet bowl.

00:56:41.688 --> 00:56:43.932
Right, I hear him.

00:56:43.932 --> 00:56:44.721
I hear them at night.

00:56:44.721 --> 00:56:49.192
That is his nail routine Once every three weeks.

00:56:49.192 --> 00:56:50.764
I saw this thing on Instagram.

00:56:50.764 --> 00:56:54.184
You have to go to the nail salon and have some lady tell you you have sausage fingers, like are you kidding?

00:56:54.646 --> 00:56:56.612
And thank God it was me because I started laughing.

00:56:56.612 --> 00:56:58.686
I was like, well, you should do something about that right now.

00:56:58.686 --> 00:57:00.090
And she was like I'm going to.

00:57:00.090 --> 00:57:00.880
And I was like okay.

00:57:00.880 --> 00:57:05.469
And then when I got them I felt almost like kind of like telling your family about the business.

00:57:05.469 --> 00:57:08.516
I was like I should probably call my mom and tell her I have like pointy nails now.

00:57:08.516 --> 00:57:11.382
And then I'm like why do I have to tell everyone I have pointy?

00:57:11.382 --> 00:57:12.947
And everyone's like Whoa, those are kind of crazy.

00:57:12.947 --> 00:57:21.208
I'm like really Cause the lady said that I had sausage fingers and actually now that I know what I know she's.

00:57:22.188 --> 00:57:25.192
So I'm also a really big believer in other people.

00:57:25.192 --> 00:57:38.304
I believe in my heart, for whatever job it is for the most part, that if I'm going to you, you're really good at that thing that you do, so I put full like I literally don't actually pick my nail colors.

00:57:38.304 --> 00:57:43.860
I let Andy at my nail salon pick them for me and I always joke.

00:57:43.860 --> 00:57:48.791
I'm like I need a lot of leadership and he's like I know, ms Rebecca, he's like you're so he goes, you're so low key joke.

00:57:48.791 --> 00:57:52.460
I'm like I need a lot of leadership and he's like I know, miss Rebecca, he's like you're so low key.

00:57:53.659 --> 00:57:57.887
But I'm like Amy, I'm like the least low key person that comes here, because once I'm in there, I'm like a tornado.

00:57:57.887 --> 00:57:59.190
It takes like three texts.

00:57:59.190 --> 00:58:00.193
We're all talking.

00:58:00.193 --> 00:58:08.596
One time I went there and I like came back with a tattoo two weeks later because I sat next to a girl in the pedicure chair and she had an amazing tattoo and I went and got one from the same person.

00:58:08.596 --> 00:58:10.657
Oh my God, I love it.

00:58:10.657 --> 00:58:12.077
He's always like you're so low key.

00:58:12.077 --> 00:58:13.038
I'm like, oh yeah.

00:58:13.057 --> 00:58:14.978
You're like yeah, andy, I'm so low key.

00:58:14.978 --> 00:58:15.739
Thanks for that.

00:58:16.159 --> 00:58:21.847
But like I literally did feel the need to call my mom and tell her that I got pointy nails Like a man would never.

00:58:21.847 --> 00:58:28.594
I saw a thing on Instagram the other day about a man using Dawn dish soap in his shower.

00:58:28.594 --> 00:58:42.056
Like his girlfriend saw it when she went to his apartment and he said, if it works for baby ducks, it works for me just fine and that is what he had been using for his hair and his body.

00:58:42.056 --> 00:58:43.922
I'm not saying it's wrong.

00:58:43.922 --> 00:58:55.025
I'm just saying we have different spending that we're doing on how we're coming to the table and you're using dish soap.

00:58:55.025 --> 00:59:05.023
I know, oh my God, like don't judge me on my pointy nails and my pencil skirt and my accolades.

00:59:05.023 --> 00:59:06.286
Let me just be me.

00:59:06.286 --> 00:59:07.507
You're allowed to be proud.

00:59:07.507 --> 00:59:09.693
I'm proud of you, but you're allowed to be proud of you.

00:59:09.693 --> 00:59:10.554
Don't have to be humble.

00:59:12.920 --> 00:59:16.451
So my husband's best friend called him one day.

00:59:16.451 --> 00:59:27.085
My husband's best friend is a doctor and his other friend, who is a plastic surgeon, pulled him aside and was like what are we doing for your face?

00:59:27.085 --> 00:59:28.222
It's my husband's friend.

00:59:28.222 --> 00:59:28.706
And he was like what are we doing for your face?

00:59:28.706 --> 00:59:29.318
It's my husband's friend.

00:59:29.318 --> 00:59:30.434
And he was like what do you mean?

00:59:30.434 --> 00:59:31.215
I'm not doing anything.

00:59:31.215 --> 00:59:35.230
And he was like I'm going to need you to go buy all these things immediately these lotions and potions.

00:59:35.230 --> 00:59:40.123
The men are taking care of their faces now and it looks like you could use that.

00:59:40.123 --> 00:59:47.030
So he went and he bought all the lotions and potions and then he immediately called my husband and was like you need to start doing.

00:59:47.030 --> 00:59:47.731
I've just learned.

00:59:47.731 --> 00:59:50.014
We're doing lotions and potions now like the ladies.

00:59:50.034 --> 00:59:50.875
You're spreading the word.

00:59:50.875 --> 00:59:54.648
He's spreading the word and he was like we need to start doing the lotions and potions.

00:59:54.648 --> 00:59:56.585
And my husband was like I don't need the lotions and potions.

00:59:56.585 --> 00:59:57.969
He went up to him.

00:59:57.969 --> 01:00:00.168
He sent him everything.

01:00:00.168 --> 01:00:11.568
We got multiple Amazon packages for like a week and it was like here's the face wash for the day and here's the night cream and the day cream and the serum and the this.

01:00:11.568 --> 01:00:12.873
My husband looked at all this and he was like what the fuck?

01:00:12.873 --> 01:00:13.335
And I was like do it?

01:00:13.335 --> 01:00:14.659
My husband is obsessed with all the skincare products.

01:00:14.659 --> 01:00:16.161
Now I have to order him.

01:00:16.161 --> 01:00:18.264
He likes this one Glossier serum.

01:00:18.264 --> 01:00:20.327
I love Glossier, yes.

01:00:20.949 --> 01:00:24.054
I ordered it for him from Sephora, cause he knows I like to get my points right.

01:00:24.054 --> 01:00:29.163
He's like I'm out of the serum, so, look, some of the men are getting the memo.

01:00:29.302 --> 01:00:30.686
Some of the men are getting the memo Wait.

01:00:30.686 --> 01:00:35.833
So this reminds me of like something I loved that you did the other day, because you have a deep love for Sephora.

01:00:36.737 --> 01:00:38.501
Oh, my God, I have a very deep love for Sephora.

01:00:38.501 --> 01:00:40.682
I also just have a deep love for points.

01:00:40.682 --> 01:00:42.324
I don't know if y'all are like that.

01:00:42.324 --> 01:00:43.266
Are you points people?

01:00:43.266 --> 01:00:44.907
Yes, I'm into it.

01:00:44.907 --> 01:00:46.690
Get an altar Right.

01:00:46.690 --> 01:00:51.175
I want my points If it's Sephora, if it's Blaze, if it's wherever we frequent.

01:00:51.175 --> 01:00:53.016
Are you getting your McDonald's points, rebecca?

01:00:53.016 --> 01:00:53.900
Yeah, I definitely do.

01:00:53.900 --> 01:00:55.001
I definitely do, don't worry.

01:00:55.963 --> 01:00:59.286
We had a situation where at one point my app went to zero.

01:00:59.286 --> 01:01:05.353
I was like wait a minute, who do I call to figure out where everything went?

01:01:05.353 --> 01:01:08.356
Because I have a lot of points, a lot of points.

01:01:08.356 --> 01:01:11.650
So I'm like, so I wouldn't use it for like 30 days.

01:01:11.650 --> 01:01:18.166
And they know me at McDonald's, like we're friends, they've, like they've actually gifted me a t-shirt when their wardrobe changed.

01:01:18.166 --> 01:01:21.784
Like sometimes they give me like the discount if I didn't use my thing.

01:01:21.784 --> 01:01:23.922
So they're like why aren't you using your app?

01:01:23.922 --> 01:01:24.545
I'm like mine.

01:01:24.545 --> 01:01:26.869
It zeroed out, like something's wrong with it.

01:01:26.869 --> 01:01:33.722
So I had to like do all this stuff, redownload it, like reconnect it, because my email kept getting, like you have this many points.

01:01:33.722 --> 01:01:35.467
Then it would go in the app and it would say zero.

01:01:35.467 --> 01:01:37.902
I'm like can't be right, something's wrong.

01:01:37.902 --> 01:01:48.532
So I wouldn't touch it at all and then all of a sudden, 30 days later, it was back on, came back okay, that's wild, but you try to make a trend the other day that was like a.

01:01:48.572 --> 01:01:49.815
Maybelline trend.

01:01:50.639 --> 01:01:51.782
Oh, the Maybelline concealer.

01:01:52.043 --> 01:01:52.585
It was good.

01:01:52.585 --> 01:01:54.710
Yes, and it blew my mind because I went right out.

01:01:54.710 --> 01:01:55.541
Have you seen this?

01:01:55.541 --> 01:01:57.606
So they're using the like little.

01:01:57.606 --> 01:02:05.509
I don't even know if it's really concealer, it's like BB cream, basically, but like in a little poof thing, it's like a poof ball.

01:02:05.509 --> 01:02:13.581
Yes, it's like the little wand, basically, that you get from Maybelline, cause you were like I'm a Sephora girl, but I keep seeing this trend and I'm going to try it.

01:02:14.083 --> 01:02:27.755
So you go to the drugstore and the point is that normally, we all put like a yellow tinted one, like a lighter yellow tinted one, but this one is tinted pink and it is a game changer.

01:02:27.755 --> 01:02:32.742
Is tinted pink and it is a game changer.

01:02:32.742 --> 01:02:41.588
I'm never going back and I will only buy pink, for, like under my eyes and like across here, it's literally just the same shade of like yellow versus pink, like a light shade, but it made you look so much more awake.

01:02:41.588 --> 01:02:44.161
I was like immediately going to see, immediately buying.

01:02:44.161 --> 01:02:49.994
It makes sense, cause you're oh well, putting yellow here is going to make me look like I'm more tired.

01:02:49.994 --> 01:02:54.990
Would have never thought to put pink, though, because we all grew up with, like remember, the green.

01:02:54.990 --> 01:03:02.730
You were like you're supposed to put the green like, almost like a lipstick, but you would put it on your red blemishes to like even them out.

01:03:02.730 --> 01:03:06.929
What a nightmare, the amount of makeup things that the three of us have been through.

01:03:10.940 --> 01:03:11.240
Y'all, I can't.

01:03:11.280 --> 01:03:19.585
it's wild, but it's also so fun it is, but it's like we were born in the apricot scrub days and people are like no wonder our screw was on fire.

01:03:19.585 --> 01:03:27.990
We were literally rubbing it with walnut shells every five seconds and then ripping out the pore strips y Y'all.

01:03:28.030 --> 01:03:29.132
I still use those pore strips.

01:03:29.132 --> 01:03:31.202
I still have them, I still use them.

01:03:32.105 --> 01:03:36.652
If I can see what's coming out, the actual validation for me.

01:03:36.652 --> 01:03:41.327
I think that's why I like a wax so much, because I'm like, look at that, look at that.

01:03:41.889 --> 01:03:44.394
There's a woman on TikTok.

01:03:44.394 --> 01:03:47.485
Jenny, there's a woman on TikTok.

01:03:47.485 --> 01:03:49.090
This is your other reason to get on TikTok.

01:03:49.090 --> 01:03:51.326
So there's like people who sell stuff on TikTok.

01:03:51.326 --> 01:03:52.349
There's like a TikTok shop.

01:03:52.349 --> 01:03:52.610
It's like-.

01:03:52.800 --> 01:03:53.463
I did know that.

01:03:53.463 --> 01:03:54.547
I heard you just were talking about it.

01:03:55.141 --> 01:04:06.773
So she has this nose wand, okay, where she can suck all her blackheads out, but it has a camera, so you can see I want it so bad.

01:04:09.380 --> 01:04:10.907
It's like on your Christmas list.

01:04:10.927 --> 01:04:19.088
You're like I would love that the problem is I already have one, but mine doesn't have a camera, so it's like you don't get that satisfying knowing you just see the after.

01:04:19.730 --> 01:04:21.947
I had a nose one I had to take it away from myself.

01:04:22.652 --> 01:04:24.099
Oh you were using it too much yeah.

01:04:25.322 --> 01:04:32.144
I made like little like tears, basically, like I was like, okay, this, I have two OCD for the nose one, so I like gave it to a friend.

01:04:32.144 --> 01:04:41.429
But like, yes, I live for that's why we have a hair remover that we like, okay, you have it.

01:04:41.429 --> 01:04:41.869
Which one?

01:04:41.869 --> 01:04:46.425
We have the nude Nude, the N-O-O-D, and it works.

01:04:46.425 --> 01:04:48.530
Yeah, do you know who got me on it?

01:04:48.530 --> 01:04:48.931
Taco Bell.

01:04:48.931 --> 01:04:51.884
She got the one three years ago.

01:04:51.884 --> 01:04:59.809
That was their original and then over Christmas they upgraded and so we both got them and she gave her original to one of our other friends.

01:04:59.809 --> 01:05:02.184
We have a coupon code.

01:05:02.184 --> 01:05:08.126
Actually with Mayhem We'll post it again, but I am a giant fan.

01:05:08.126 --> 01:05:11.240
I will do anything to be like baby dolphin from the chin down.

01:05:11.621 --> 01:05:16.882
Yeah yeah, yeah, and I don't even use it on my legs because I'm too lazy by the time I get to like the actual business.

01:05:16.882 --> 01:05:19.929
I'm like I can do that on my legs on my own, but like.

01:05:20.731 --> 01:05:22.983
Can I tell you the most embarrassing place that I need this?

01:05:22.983 --> 01:05:23.985
For what?

01:05:24.005 --> 01:05:24.646
are you going to say your chin?

01:05:24.646 --> 01:05:25.528
What are you going to?

01:05:25.548 --> 01:05:27.733
say your chin Mm-mm, what you are never going to guess.

01:05:27.733 --> 01:05:35.085
Okay, so my best friend does my hair Okay In her bathroom, like I literally will sometimes at the end.

01:05:35.105 --> 01:05:35.967
No, I love, we love these people.

01:05:35.967 --> 01:05:36.630
Take the oils down.

01:05:37.161 --> 01:05:41.090
And I like strip down naked and like shower in her shower and like use all her husband's products.

01:05:41.090 --> 01:05:55.840
Okay so I'm like her razor, her razor.

01:05:55.860 --> 01:05:58.748
Okay so I, after having a child, I grow hair and it's coarse, wiry hair on the back of my neck.

01:05:58.768 --> 01:06:03.385
I'm not even shocked by this Disgusting Like they're the ugliest hairs in the entire world.

01:06:03.565 --> 01:06:04.753
She's like I can't, I don't even know about them.

01:06:04.753 --> 01:06:06.141
Like what if I have them, feel them?

01:06:06.961 --> 01:06:14.045
No, you would know, because, like when you would put your hair up in a ponytail, they would just out like this they were fucking ugly.

01:06:14.445 --> 01:06:15.530
They were like angry hair.

01:06:15.891 --> 01:06:16.594
They're disgusting.

01:06:16.594 --> 01:06:22.085
So she would be like I cannot even highlight these, these are just, I don't even know what to do with these.

01:06:22.085 --> 01:06:25.090
And so I was like, well, what do we do?

01:06:25.090 --> 01:06:26.813
And she goes, well, I can wax them for you.

01:06:26.813 --> 01:06:27.715
I was like, well, what do we do?

01:06:27.715 --> 01:06:29.356
And she goes, well, I can wax them for you.

01:06:29.356 --> 01:06:29.978
I was like, okay, great, yeah.

01:06:29.978 --> 01:06:34.192
So she, every time I go get my hair done, she gets her thing out and she waxes my neck like I'm a man, y'all Okay.

01:06:35.061 --> 01:06:44.869
And I just had a blowout in Atlanta because I was there for that award show and, as the woman's like washing my hair, I'm like, okay, hi, so embarrassing thing.

01:06:44.869 --> 01:06:45.690
Two embarrassing things.

01:06:45.690 --> 01:06:54.215
One I have psoriasis on my head and two, I also have like neck hairs See like it's growing back because it's been like two weeks since I got my hair done.

01:06:54.215 --> 01:06:56.797
She was like girl, you need to get the nude.

01:06:57.902 --> 01:06:59.507
Yeah, that's what I need it for.

01:06:59.507 --> 01:07:00.981
Yep, there's.

01:07:00.981 --> 01:07:01.963
I'm like a big fan.

01:07:01.963 --> 01:07:03.364
Prasik talked me into it.

01:07:03.364 --> 01:07:09.643
I'm better about it in the winter and I do wax also, so I'm like I mean I would show you pictures, but it's completely inappropriate.

01:07:09.643 --> 01:07:12.530
I am well on my way to baby dolphin status.

01:07:12.590 --> 01:07:14.889
I'm like so excited about it Like does it hurt?

01:07:16.014 --> 01:07:16.998
Every once in a while you'll get one.

01:07:16.998 --> 01:07:19.842
You're like, okay, okay.

01:07:19.882 --> 01:07:22.085
I've had professional laser hair removal on that shit.

01:07:22.085 --> 01:07:22.925
It's like a bitch.

01:07:23.065 --> 01:07:25.469
Oh, I bet there's definitely some like everyone's smile.

01:07:25.469 --> 01:07:27.831
You like get the smell of like a burning hair and you're like yeah.

01:07:27.831 --> 01:07:34.927
Okay, done, I'm going to purchase it, like I mean, for $150, knowing what you know about professional.

01:07:34.927 --> 01:07:38.545
Yes, it's like my obsession.

01:07:38.764 --> 01:07:39.788
I'm immediately purchasing it.

01:07:39.788 --> 01:07:40.369
Thank you so much.

01:07:40.750 --> 01:07:41.150
I love this.

01:07:41.150 --> 01:07:52.670
Okay, we're we're going to have to have you back on because I feel like we have so much more to talk about, but you're amazing.

01:07:52.670 --> 01:07:53.092
Thank you so much.

01:07:53.112 --> 01:07:54.016
Let's talk about where everyone can find you.

01:07:54.016 --> 01:07:54.338
Okay, oh my gosh.

01:07:54.338 --> 01:07:57.224
I hang out on Instagram the most, so I have an Instagram.

01:07:57.264 --> 01:07:57.706
I love it.

01:07:57.706 --> 01:07:59.630
It keeps me like happy.

01:07:59.630 --> 01:08:00.873
Oh, thank you.

01:08:00.873 --> 01:08:04.083
I see the little updates and I'm like Ooh what is she doing?

01:08:04.163 --> 01:08:05.105
What is that crazy lady doing?

01:08:05.105 --> 01:08:11.532
Okay, so my personal brand account is at Sarah S-A-R-A, underscore Wiles W-I-L-E-S.

01:08:11.532 --> 01:08:14.275
So that's if you just want the unhinged crazy.

01:08:14.275 --> 01:08:25.810
And then if you are somebody who is either looking for a VA or wants to become a VA or is a VA, then you should go, not be on the unhinged side of my Instagram and that one is at the start and grow co.

01:08:27.894 --> 01:08:28.354
I will link.

01:08:28.354 --> 01:08:32.251
We will link both of those in the caption, also for the podcast.

01:08:32.251 --> 01:08:38.600
You have been amazing, thank you for being so candid and so authentic.

01:08:38.600 --> 01:08:41.689
I like cannot tell you how much we really appreciate it.

01:08:41.689 --> 01:08:45.426
That's so much what the space is, but just thank you, thank you, thank you.

01:08:45.787 --> 01:08:47.867
Yes, and I'm going to go try TikTok now.

01:08:49.121 --> 01:08:50.323
We got her.

01:08:51.284 --> 01:08:52.507
I mean, I might as well right.

01:08:52.568 --> 01:08:54.693
Please find me so I can send you unhinged videos.

01:08:54.920 --> 01:08:55.841
I cannot wait, yes.

01:08:56.583 --> 01:08:56.864
Amazing.

01:08:56.885 --> 01:08:58.408
We'll get like a group chat going.

01:08:58.948 --> 01:09:00.512
Let's get it, I love it.

01:09:00.739 --> 01:09:02.243
Thank you so much.

01:09:02.243 --> 01:09:03.024
You're the best.

01:09:03.024 --> 01:09:03.945
You're the best.

01:09:03.945 --> 01:09:04.185
Bye.

01:09:04.726 --> 01:09:06.109
Thanks, thanks guys, see you next week.